Controlling Behavior

Controlling behavior refers to actions by an individual aimed at gaining and maintaining power over another person, often through manipulation, coercion, threats, intimidation, or isolation. This behavior seeks to conform the other person to the controller's needs or desires, frequently disregarding the other's autonomy and well-being.

Key characteristics of controlling behavior include:

• Manipulation and coercion: Using psychological tactics such as guilt trips, emotional blackmail, or threats to influence the other person.
• Intimidation and threats: Creating fear to enforce compliance.
• Isolation: Limiting the victim's contact with others to increase dependence.
• Micromanagement: Constant monitoring and deciding things for the other person.
• Withholding resources: Such as finances or information to exert control.
• Overbearing and inflexible demands: Insisting everything be done their way without regard for others' opinions.

Controlling behavior can range from unhealthy and unhelpful to outright abusive, especially when it involves coercion or ongoing degradation. It is often linked to psychological, physical, sexual, or financial abuse and can create a climate of fear and emotional dependency known as traumatic bonding.

People exhibiting controlling behavior may do so due to anxiety, a desire for dominance, or personality disorders such as those in Cluster B (narcissistic, borderline, antisocial, histrionic).

In relationships, controlling behavior damages trust and autonomy and often requires setting firm boundaries and seeking support to address it effectively.